In my new artist life I’m affecting my past. Maybe I’ll explain. Our culture guides me (limits), music schools, too, so limiting, this idea that sounds and noises are too uncivilized. Those need to be made, forced to be civilized, organized, homogenized, classified– controlled. If not, better be a strong justification for such transgression, crowd noises, traffic, wind, rubber tires on a road– the squawks and rumble of a gurdy.
So I find myself feeling more confused than ever. Not every idea works now. This is my forever advice. Never let pride get in the way. The goal– and I get this from our teachers as far back as nine years old– is about this way music serves to exalt the player, instrument, and composer. What music is good for nothing but to shore up those cherished elements, or to make money.
Intending to continue with that blind-additive style of composing, my words for the Exquisite Corpse in art, as applied to music. So, what I got at first sounded so chaotic. I cried. My first attempt, sort of unpleasant I thought. This piece ended up for me to point towards that back and forth feeling in my mind.
So I’m walking backwards like this, in retrograde with these ideas, as such deconstructing something here, my music… not just the piece itself, but my belief system. Cover art adapted from photo by Amy Pierce. Pianist and friend Joachim Mencel sends his part, at my request, from Krakow, Poland.